The Spin and the Real Deal

The Spin:

On July 14th, 2011, just days after my 11th birthday, I was diagnosed with Ewing's Sarcoma, an aggressive form of bone cancer. As a result, my family and I had to move from our home in Hawaii to Washington State so that I could receive better cancer treatment and a limb-salvage surgery to save my left leg. I am surviving treatment at Seattle Children’s Hospital, but hopefully I'll be back in Hawaii at the end of the summer, 2012.  Things I miss from home: my friends, my Nana, roller derby, school, warm weather, beaches, and even the coqui frogs.

The Real Deal:

I wrote the introduction to Lauren's CaringBridge account because she was too ill to do it herself.  The Spin is upbeat and positive.  The Real Deal is that I was and am still not this positive.  It is mostly the alter-ego persona of my badass Mama Bear.  Truth is, I'm still terrified and wake up in the middle of the night, searching for her forehead.  Is she feverish?  Is she ill?  How can I rest when my child is fighting for her life?  These are the 3am questions that continue to haunt me.